Life… for better or for worse

You know life has handed me some pretty amazing people in my time. My friends know who you are and a few i consider my sisters like Emilie or Kenzie. But it is safe to admit that i have been looking for a male figure, someone to hang out with and not be girly and shit. G (not sure if I use his actual name so I'll use the street) . G is an amazing friend. You ever had one of those great friends of the opposite sex where you can be your fucked up self and they don''t care, be as gross as you want or whatever? G is one of those friends bringing me up when I'm down, never letting me feel like I don't belong. We hang out all the time. I always go over to work to "work" or "swim" but in actuality I'm hanging out and acting stupid with him. It's great because we don't always have to be stupid and crazy to have something in common. We have completely serious conversations about anything. It's kind of like having a boyfriend without all the baggage. It was funny, today G said that one day he wants to meet my ex… so he can give him a piece of mind(in short terms, kick his ass). I am so stoked! I honestly thought this year was going to suck. But slowly things a turning around (and only half way through the year…) Well life is good for me, I hope yours is successful.

Happy

So my bumming mood is over! I have been forgiven! It wasn't the way I wanted or what I hoped for but it was something. Right?

Awful

I am honestly feeling awful! (Incase you didn't see the title) I don't really have a clue of what to think anymore. I am no longer in hate but rather i am regretting everything i've said and i feel that the only way i can fix it is to write a letter that i can pour my heart into but considering the timing i am wrong and it would seem skanky. i keep having these awful nightmares but in reality it is just a repeat of what i did and said. To be honest, i keep thinking about what we did and i am heartbroken. i just wanted some time away you know cuz the summer of opportunities was coming up and i was tired of hurting. I don;t know what to do lets all hope i make the right choice.

For truth

I believe that this past weekend I have truly connected with God! In some strange way I feel different and more mature. Listening to Justin Fatica's (LOOK HIM UP) talk really opened my eyes to the people around me. Not only the ones that I care for but the ones that I don't even know. I am truly upset that we had to leave early. But what he said will stay in my heart forever. I may listen to the music that is awful, I may cuss up a storm, but I am a God fearing Catholic girl who doesn't want to destroy her relationship with Our Lord Jesus Christ. As Justin said, "YOU ARE AMAZING AND DON'T LET ANYONE TELL YOU THAT YOU AREN'T!!!!" If you are a parent who doesn't know how to protect their kids from this world, get one of his books. If you are a teen who feels alone and without a purpose, get his books! God Bless Everyone in this joyful season!

Today's topic: Dumbass People

mainly today i am just sick of people. Random people just walking in the hall that think they are the shiz are the worst. It's pretty hard to describe this hatred that you have for someone that you don't even know. Just the way they walk, the way they talk, the way they laugh and smile. it is so annoying how people think that they are right. your hair is huge your ass is unproportional… why are people so in love with you? Jealous, leeching people maybe? I honestly have no idea but what i do know is people just need to knock the fuck off!!!!!